Agápe
by shinigami714
Summary: Fili and Kili have a rare day off, and a bit of innocent playing leads to something more. Fili/Kili. Incest, Fluff, Mild Angst. A prompt fill for CatWesker!


AN: This is a fill for a prompt from CatWesker. I took my sweet time getting around to it, despite having the urge to write it for a couple weeks now. Thinking about it also made me think of at least three more Fili/Kili ideas, which I will be starting on next. I love these two.

Warnings: Fluff, Incest, Angst I suppose.

Pairing: Fili/Kili

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**Agápe**

Fili and Kili were for once enjoying a relaxing day off with each other, just the two of them. Ever since Fili's beard started growing in Thorin had insisted on beginning his training as an heir to the line of Durin. The elder brother had little time to spend with Kili, most of his days consumed by lessons, either in the smith, learning to craft, with Dwalin, learning to fight, or with various tutors, learning strategy and history. Kili was jealous initially, all but begging for his uncle to teach him, to include him in the lessons. Why should his brother get to learn to fight while Kili was forced to stay home all day in their incredibly boring house? Every night Kili would fire endless questions at Fili. He pleaded with his brother to teach him everything he learned, but Fili simply said that Kili would learn one day as well, when he was old enough.

Kili waited patiently for his beard to start growing in, but he was a late bloomer, and every morning his glances in the mirror revealed only a bare chin. It was particularly disheartening to watch as Fili's beard began to thicken and even grow to a length he could begin braiding. Kili had almost begun to believe he would never grow a beard when he woke one day to see the beginnings of whiskers poking from his chin. He'd eagerly run down the hallway of their home, shouting for Fili who smiled and embraced him in excitement at the sight. His brother brought him along that day to the smith to show Thorin, and Kili grinned when his uncle told him he was old enough to begin his lessons.

Kili was excited, but that excitement quickly ebbed away. The lessons were not all he thought they would be. They were tough, gruelling, and it seemed that he was always screwing things up. His brother had several years of experience on him now, and Kili felt unconfident every day they fought together. He missed spending days running through the streets and nearby forests with just Fili, not a worry in his mind. He missed when fighting with Fili was for fun and not a test of strength and power.

It had been several weeks since Kili's beard started to show itself, though it was not much more apparent than a few scattered whiskers across his face. Kili was exhausted from learning to wield a blade and shoot a bow. His arms ached from the difficult work in the blacksmith. And his mind was tired from learning the history of Erebor and the great dwarven kingdoms. So Kili revelled in the fact that he finally had a day to spend with his brother and only his brother. In fact Kili was so determined to spend it with only Fili that he'd scribbled a sign on their door, and shouted out to his mother that they were not to be interrupted, not even for meals.

Fili laughed at his antics but seemed happy enough to spend the day in Kili's presence. They sat around a board game Balin had loaned them on the floor of their bedroom. It was strategy based, and though Kili didn't particularly enjoy it, he played because Fili did. He was getting crushed, but it did not bother him, because he was with Fili, and no one else. Kili bit his fingernails as he thought through his next move. His eyes scanned the game before him until they widened when he saw a move.

"Ha! Take that brother!" Kili shouted as he eagerly moved a warrior across the board cornering his brother's men. Fili looked at him and raised an eyebrow evidently not terribly worried by the play. Kili's proud smirk began to fade as Fili moved another piece to corner Kili's own troops, effectively winning the game.

"What? Not fair! How did I not see that?" Kili shouted across at his brother. Fili sat back and smirked at him in return.

"You make this too easy brother, always falling for my traps," he drawled, the tiny braids at his mouth moving up with his lips. Kili glared at him fiercely, his fingers tightening in his breeches.

"You cheat!" he gasped out, staring at his brother accusingly. Fili looked affronted, his eyebrows both rising and his brow crinkling.

"I do not cheat, don't be stupid. I just think before my plays, unlike you," Fili intoned, ever composed. It struck a chord with Kili; Fili always bested him, able to somehow predict his moves both in strategy and combat. It irked the younger dwarf to no end.

"I think!" Kili insisted, anger apparent in his voice and face. Fili snorted loudly and rolled his eyes, and that was all it took. Kili lunged across at his brother, the pieces from their game scattering across the floor violently as he tackled Fili to the ground.

"Ooof!" the older dwarf groaned as his back hit the floor hard. If there was one thing about Kili that was unpredictable it was his temper. He could go from happy to angry in mere moments and from sitting to fighting in only seconds. Fili choked briefly, the wind knocked out of him before he regained his composure and began fighting back. The two brothers wrestled with each other on the floor rolling around and throwing the occasional punch. And though their fights often got violent neither would ever aim to seriously hurt the other. Soon both dwarves were smiling and laughing as they struggled to push each other to the ground. It had been ages since they had wrestled like this, without a care in the world, and without another dwarf judging their performance.

It was Fili that managed to pin Kili down, his fingers wrapped around the other's wrists as he held his brother to the floor. Kili squirmed a bit against him and pouted up at his brother's smiling eyes.

"There's game pieces digging into my hip brother, have mercy!" Kili pleaded.

"And whose fault is it that they are scattered across the floor I wonder?" Fili asked. He chuckled at his brother before he full on grinned and suddenly his fingers were moving down Kili's side playfully, tickling him without sympathy. Kili screeched and grappled weakly against Fili as deep laughter poured from his throat.

"Hey! Th-that's not fair!" He fought to get out between giggles. Fili laughed loudly and smiled then dragged his hands up under his brother's shirt to tickle his belly. This had always been one of Kili's greatest weaknesses.

"St-stop it!" Kili panted though he was smiling and laughing as his hands pushed lightly at his brother's chest. Fili tickled him for ages, thoroughly enjoying the happy sounds that came from his brother. Finally he conceded and settled his hands on either side of Kili, watching as his brother's chest rose and fell with deep breaths. Kili's dark hair fanned out around his head, messy and filled with knots from their fighting. His brow was covered in a light sheen of sweat, and his cheeks were flushed from exertion. Fili thought he looked perfect. He had heard many compare him and his brother to night and day. If Fili's golden hair represented the brilliant light of the sun then Kili's deep dark locks were the perfect image of the night sky. However, in that moment, as Fili looked down at his brother's joyous smile, his face positively radiating with warmth, Fili figured his brother was far more like the sun than he would ever be. His brother's happiness was captivating.

"You fight dirty!" Kili gasped out, as he wheezed and struggled to catch his breath. His eyes were shut and he was still gasping for air when he felt a soft press against his own lips. Kili's eyes opened in a flash as he inhaled quickly in shock. Fili was kissing him. His brother was kissing him! He felt a tongue probing across his lower lip and he opened his mouth allowing his brother access inside. Kili's eyes fluttered shut again and he moaned as Fili dragged his tongue along the roof of his mouth. The sound put a halt to the older brother's actions. Fili pushed his body up and away in a rush, his eyes wide as he stared upon his brother's flushed face and parted lips. Kili looked up at him, his own eyes filled with many questions. Fili swore and stumbled to his feet.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that," he stuttered out, running a hand through his thick blonde locks and swallowing thickly. Kili was unable to voice any words as he lay still spread out on the floor of their room. Fili glanced at him quickly before turning away from the tempting sight.

"Forget that happened," he whispered and fled from the room in a hurry. Kili watched him leave, his lips wet and red, still tingling with the memory of his brother's kiss. He moved only to press fingers to his mouth, and spent the rest of the day lying on the ground surrounded by pieces from their game.

By the time evening rolled around Kili had decided what to do. He managed to get up and clean up their room, and then joined his mother for dinner. Fili was still nowhere to be found and Kili spent the meal evading questions from Dis until he excused himself for bed. He lay under his covers, unable to sleep, until he heard his brother quietly slip into the room and into his own bed across the way. Kili feigned sleep, waiting patiently until he heard Fili's breath deepen, then a bit longer just to be safe. He slid from his bed and crept across the room to his brother, pausing at his side to look down.

His eyes lingered on Fili's lips, as he convinced himself to continue. It would be quick, just a soft touch, Fili wouldn't even notice. After steeling himself, Kili lent down, his lips hovering just above his brother's, and then quickly he pressed them together, pulling away hastily and running back to his own bed. His face flushed from the action as he covered his body with blankets. He willed himself to calm down, listening carefully to make sure Fili still slept soundly. The younger dwarf bit his lip gently then smiled. He'd kissed his brother! For some reason the thought filled him with glee. That night Kili slept soundly, thoughts of his brother's lips filling his dreams.

The next few days were slightly awkward. Fili avoided Kili, often spending long hours at the blacksmith apprenticing with Thorin. The few times their lessons were together, Fili avoided his brother's eyes, and though Kili was upset by being ignored, just thinking of kissing his brother made him smile with happiness. Each passing night he would sneak across their room for a kiss, his lips lingering upon Fili's for a moment longer each time. Still he made sure not to wake Fili, embarrassed by his actions and more than a little confused by the appeal of kissing his own brother.

One night Kili took a particularly risky step. He remembered the feeling of Fili's tongue in his mouth, and how tingles had travelled down his spine when the muscle grazed the roof of his mouth. He wanted that again. He wanted to deepen the kisses. He wanted more. So Kili arranged his body above his brother's sleeping form and tentatively ran his tongue across Fili's lips. He kissed lightly and continued to press against him until he felt his brother's lips parting. Kili smiled and pressed his tongue inside, lightly moaning at the sensation when he felt his brother's arm grip him from behind and pull him down against him.

"Kili," Fili whispered and the two writhed against each other, kissing passionately until a soft press against Kili's chest pushed him up and away from his brother's body.

"Kili don't, you can't do this," Fili spoke gently, sitting up and moving away from the other to rest against the wall.

"Why not? You…you don't like it brother?" Kili questioned, his heart somewhat pained by the notion that his brother did not want him near. His eyes were wide and pleading as he looked upon Fili, and the older dwarf sighed heavily and folded his hands in his lap.

"It's not that Kili, not at all. I like it, very much so," Fili claimed.

"Then…why? I don't get it, what's wrong with this?" Kili pressed, moving close to his brother again with the hopes of kissing once more. Fili stopped him, a strong hand placed at his chest, as he pushed him back once more.

"You don't understand the meaning behind this brother, you're young still, and curious, but you don't understand what kissing like this entails. You're not kissing me for the same reason I did you. I feel like I'm taking advantage of you," Fili spoke and Kili opened his mouth to disagree.

"Shh, don't argue for once. You know I'm right," Fili softly insisted, and Kili's eyes stung with tears that he didn't understand. He looked down, deflated and embarrassed by his actions.

"…You're always right," he finally muttered, his fingers clenching in the thick sheets. He felt movement on the bed, and then a hand was pulling his chin up so he looked into his brother's face.

"Hey, I'm not angry with you, okay? Know that I'm not angry with you. It was my fault to begin with," Fili said, softly stroking his brother's hair. All Kili could do was nod.

"But no more kisses, not like this, promise me," Fili said, and he looked into Kili's eyes for an answer. The younger dwarf nodded once again and the brothers embraced before Kili returned to his own bed. He felt incredibly downtrodden, and had difficulty sleeping that night. His brother's words occupied his mind, and he couldn't help but wonder, why exactly had his brother kissed him?

The next few days Kili pondered who he could ask. Why did people kiss each other? Why had he kissed Fili? Was it really just curiosity? If that was the case, why did it hurt so much when Fili turned him away? He was alone with Thorin on a Thursday afternoon when he blurted out one of the questions that had been plaguing him.

"Uncle, why do we kiss?" Kili spoke as he carved a pattern into metal. Thorin had paused in his blacksmithing, turning to look at his nephew with a frown. He could think of no reason Kili would ask such a question of him. Thorin rarely kissed anyone, though he thought on the few times he'd pressed a kiss into Kili's hair, or on Fili's cheek, and even more rarely when he'd kiss the brow of a fellow warrior, and thought that must be what his nephew spoke of.

"Camaraderie," he'd said, returning to his work and urging Kili to do the same. The young dwarf scowled at the hilt he'd been working on. Somehow it wasn't quite the answer he was looking for.

He spent the following days watching his brother. Kili did feel camaraderie towards Fili, after all, they were best friends, and always had been. They were brothers for goodness sake! Nearly inseparable. However it still did not explain the kisses. Friends didn't just kiss each other on the lips, he knew that much. He'd seen Thorin kiss brows and cheeks, even hands on occasion, but never another on the lips. The only dwarf Kili could think of whom had was Dwalin. And so it was, that three days later, after a sparring lesson, Kili asked the dwarf warrior his question.

"Why do dwarves kiss…on the lips?" He'd sputtered, a light flush covering his cheeks as he nibbled on a snack. Dwalin gave him a strange look as he set down the blade he'd been cleaning.

"Oh? I guess you're about at that age, laddie. Got a lass in mind have you?" Before Kili had a chance to correct the warrior, Dwalin had begun recounting tales of various exploits with dwarves. Kili was aghast, staring at the other, his mouth wide with shock. The lusty stories explained nothing to the young dwarf, though they did manage to successfully appal him and turn him off the idea of ever bedding a lady. No, Kili did not think Dwalin's answer was right at all. It wasn't until later that night, when Kili woke from a very vivid dream in which his brother pleasured him thoroughly, that Kili thought Dwalin might have been on to something. He holed himself up in the washroom, willing his embarrassment to recede, only having mild success after a freezing cold shower. The following day Kili did his best to avoid looking anywhere near Fili, for fear that his face would turn red as a tomato and that he'd recall how his brother's body moved atop his in the dream.

Despite the continuation of similar dreams Kili still wasn't satisfied with Dwalin's answer. He finally managed to will away lascivious thoughts, so that he could ask yet another dwarf for help. This time it was Balin, in the middle of a lesson on the history of Erebor.

"Kissing, you ask? Why that's a form of courting!" Balin had stated. The dwarf began by explaining bonds, and commitment, and then quickly moved on to rituals and marriage. Balin explained everything there was to know of the great ceremonies that Erebor hosted when two souls joined each other in union. Kili soon faded, as his question had sparked a full on history lesson it seemed, and by the time he returned home, night had fallen and he was completely knackered. Leave it to Balin to turn a simple question into a day of education. Admittedly Kili had learned some important facts. He thought of the bond between his brother and him, and he wondered at exactly what the bond they shared was, no closer to understanding than he was before he'd spoken to the wise dwarf.

On his next day off Kili pouted and walked listlessly around their home. Normally he would have planned the day around Fili, but the two had barely spoken since the initial kissing incident, and Kili was even more afraid to approach his brother after all the dreams he'd been having. He sighed heavily and stood to get some fresh air when he heard his mother call to him from the kitchen. She sat at the table and beckoned him to sit down with her.

"What is it mother?" Kili asked as he made himself comfortable, pulling a bowl of nuts close to nibble on.

"I think I'm the one that should be asking you such a question," she stated and Kili paused, a peanut inches from his mouth as he glanced up at her in surprise.

"You've been acting strange for almost a month now! What's upsetting you Kili? Even your brother has been odd, rarely speaking, and leaving early each morning for his lessons. Usually you two are attached at the hip!" She tapped her fingers on the table and waited for her youngest son to answer. Kili's eyes wandered the room, and he gave up on the bowl of nuts, pushing it away with frustration. Finally he slouched and asked her.

"Why…why do dwarves kiss one another?" he hesitantly questioned. His mother's tapping stopped and she watched him intensely for a moment. Kili figured he probably should not have asked such a thing when his mother was speaking of him and Fili.

"I…I asked Thorin initially, and he said camaraderie, which seems like it could be right but didn't sit well with me. And Dwalin…well…Dwalin he," Kili couldn't finish that, blushing fiercely and coughing in a sad attempt to push aside his embarrassment.

"Balin helped a bit I suppose, but still, I don't really understand. I mean, I get that there are bonds, and ceremonies, but it doesn't explain the kissing, not really," he continued to ramble, and slowly his mother's lips quirked up in a soft smile.

"You should know better than to ask your uncle of such things Kili. The man is completely oblivious! And Dwalin! How many times have you seen that fool slapped in the street by a lass? Balin, though a better choice, is still far too consumed by books and knowledge to give a proper answer. It is not explainable. Kissing my dear child comes from the heart!" Dis said and she laughed energetically at him and pressed a hand over her own heart. Kili copied the action, placing a hand atop his own. Oddly it felt strange, as though it was beating twice as loud and twice as fast as usual within his chest.

"Kili, my son, we kiss those whom we love. It is as simple as that," Dis continued, sensing the turmoil in her son's expression. She wondered when her boys had grown up on her. Even Kili now had scruff across his chin, and she knew Fili was beginning to braid his hair and beard intricately. Soon her two sons would be proper dwarf adults. She thought fondly on how the two were always around one another, and understood now what had been bothering them both. She should have seen it sooner. Dis smiled wistfully, oh to be young again.

"Love?" Kili asked, his voice soft, and hesitant. He clasped his hands together in his lap, and a rare pensive expression overtook his face. Dis grinned at him.

"Yes. And though there are many types of love in this world, essentially it all comes back to that," she explained.

"But…how can one possibly know, which kind of love they feel?" Kili asked, his eyes scrunched up with worry.

"It is up to you to decide such a thing. Love is not something you can be told, or something that can be read. It is not speakable, nor visible. Love is something that is simply known," Dis responded, though she knew in her own heart that Kili and Fili most certainly shared a pure love, a love that could never be broken. In time the two would understand. It was not something she could tell them, but something they must discover for themselves. And by the looks of things, they were beginning to.

"When the time comes Kili, you will know what kind of love you feel, right here," she spoke and leant forward to place her hand over Kili's heart. Kili frowned slightly as he thought on his mother's words. He thought on the words everyone had spoken to him. He thought of Fili, and how much he'd missed his brother the past few days. Together it all made sense. Finally his eyes widened and he leant forward to embrace the other dwarf.

"Thank you mother," he said, placing a soft kiss on her cheek then running out the front door in a hurry to find his brother.

"Oh you silly boy, you forgot your jacket and boots!" Dis yelled after him, but Kili was long gone, trampling down the dirt road in bare feet. He was still such a child after all, despite the whiskers now growing on his face.

Kili ran down the dirt paths not entirely sure where to go. His feet led him to the blacksmith first. He ran in startling Thorin, but left in a rush, as Fili was not there. He searched the town, checking every alleyway, and poking his head into every store front. He received many smiles, laughs and glares as he continued his search. Satisfied that his brother was not to be found in the town, Kili set off down towards the nearby forest. He knew of only one other place Fili might be. Kili jumped over sticks only occasionally groaning as sharp twigs cut at his feet. He pushed branches out of the way, flying past trees until he came upon a clearing with a small river flowing through it. Kili's eyes glanced across the landscape and sure enough, there was Fili. His pant legs were rolled up to the knees, his feet dangling in the river water, as he leant back on strong arms.

"Fili!" Kili shouted at him and he ran and jumped across rocks towards his brother. Fili looked up in surprise and moved to stand as he watched his brother jump carelessly towards him.

"Kili, be careful, the rocks are slippery!" He yelled back and watched as his brother grinned then lost his balance and fell with a splash into the water.

"Kili!" Fili shouted and ran to his brother quickly, pulling him from the water by his arms.

"Kili, Aulë, are you alright?" He asked, as he pulled his brother to his chest. Kili just laughed and giggled in his arms while he shook water from his ears.

"Where are your boots? Your feet are all scratched up!" Fili cried and began to check his brother over. Suddenly he was straddled, Kili's legs on either side as him as his brother attacked his mouth with vigor. Fili gasped and kissed back, momentarily losing himself in the sensation before he came to his senses and pushed Kili away hard.

"Kili! You promised you wouldn't do this…," Fili began, but he stopped at the upset and frightened look in his brother's eyes.

"Kili?" he asked, running a hand up his brother's face. Kili grasped Fili's arms tightly in his hands.

"I love you like a brother, and I love you like a friend. I love you like a companion, and I love you like a lover. I don't think there's any form of love I do not feel for you my brother," Kili spat out, his eyes wet, and eyebrows scrunched together.

"Please, tell me it's the same for you!" Kili shouted, his fingers tightening in the fabric of Fili's shirt.

"Kili…," Fili whispered gently as he stroked a lock of hair behind Kili's ear. He looked into his brother's eyes and smiled lightly before tackling him to the ground.

"Yes, of course it is," Fili responded, and then he kissed his brother with a renewed energy.

"Of course I love you," Fili murmured between kisses. His fingers tangled in Kili's wet hair, tugging and pulling at it as he practically devoured his brother's mouth. Their teeth nipped at each other's lips, and their tongues fought for dominance as they moaned against each other with pleasure. Fili parted his brother's legs, settling between them and gripping him tightly around his waist. Kili gasped and thrust his body up into his brother's and Fili pulled back with a surprised grunt, his eyes wide as they bored into his brother's dark ones. Kili was grinning playfully, his face flushed with desire.

"Perhaps Dwalin's stories will come in handy after all," Kili said with a smirk.

"Dwalin? What on earth are you talking about brother?" Fili questioned, his eyebrow rising dramatically.

"You'll just have to wait and see!" Kili said excitedly, and then he wrapped his legs around his brother's waist and pulled him back down for more kisses. Fili certainly didn't complain.

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AN: Agápe is one of the Greek words for love, representing a pure love, or a true love. Thanks for reading!


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